Tuesday, November 01, 2005

I'm Gonna Have You Naked By The End Of This Post

Top Ten Worst Songs To Have Sex During
Two Part Answers
Reasons pertain to musicality and content

1. Raffi - Baby Baluga
A Children's music: standard no-no for listening, let alone love making
B Raises topic of babies


2. Queen - We Are The Champions
A May be interpreted as overcompensation for personal inadequacy
B Too slow


3. Spooky Sounds For Halloween
A Why is the only music you own a seasonal tape you bought at Kmart?
B Erratic noises distracting

4. N.W.A. - F*** tha Police
A Too angry
B Too eighties

5. Blue Danube Waltz
A Too bright and energetic
B Can you fuck in 3/4? No? Okay then

6. Star Wars Theme
A Too loud
B Too nerdy

7. U of M Marching Band - Let's Go Band
See number 6

8. A**l C**t - Technology Is Gay
A Band, song title make people uncomfortable
B Lots of screaming and crashing


9. Carole King - Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?

A May bring unplesant conversation to light
B Waaay too slow


10. Pulp Fiction Soundtrack - Royale With Cheese
A Actually I take it back
B Samuel Jackson is the pansexual for those of us with discriminating taste.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not to mention: the Samuel L. Jackson is the cocktail for those of us with discriminating tastes. Behold:

• One (1) cup black coffee
• One (1) shot Tanqueray gin
• One (1) green olive, stuffed with pimiento

11/07/2005 09:03:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know someone out there has made love to the Star Wars theme.
-Kyra

11/09/2005 10:21:00 PM  

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